Not that ol’ assumption again

Earlier in the week, I asked the folks in my group coaching program, “What are the assumptions you’re making about your life, career, or relationships?” The question started a great conversation and revealed deep revelations.  

I won’t tell you what the group members came up with, but I will tell you some of my old assumptions because I think it’s important for you to know that we ALL do it and then we behave as if these assumptions are true.

Here are a few that I wrote down a few years ago.

I can see how small I kept myself by looking at these statements now. Fortunately, over time I began questioning every one of these assumptions.

Here are some of the questions I ask myself about any assumption I make – and yep, I still make them.

“How did I come up with this assumption?”
“What would happen if I challenged this assumption?”
“What if I believed the opposite was true?”
“How can I test the opposite of this assumption?”

I can tell you that everyone one of these assumptions has proven false. But here’s the deal – I would still believe them to be true If I hadn’t questioned and challenged them, and did something different. I had to generate the evidence to let go of the assumption.

Here’s how I’ve reframed my old assumptions:

What are the assumptions you’re making in your life? Sometimes they’re difficult to spot because you believe in them so strongly you’re living as if they’re fact.

That’s why coaching is helpful because someone else can challenge your perceptions. A coach can see what we can’t always know about ourselves.